Mad Men actress Christina Hendricks and her husband.
When you ask experts what it takes to create and sustain a successful marriage, you get all kinds of predictable answers. Good communication skills, an ability to solve problems together, mutual respect. You’ve heard them all before, right?
But have you heard the one about how having a husband slightly uglier than the wife is a very good predictor of marriage success?
Sigh. Go ahead. Just shoot me now.
Yes, you heard right. Researchers at the University of Texas did a study that they claim proves that couples where the wife is more physically attractive than the husband have a better shot at success. They found a few ways to explain this.
One, men are shallower than women (whether nature or nurture is up in the air) and therefore will be “grateful” to have a wife prettier than they deserve and will treat her well as a result.
Two, the better looking the man, the more likely he will be to stray, especially if his wife is less attractive than he is. This goes along with other research showing that better looking men cheat more often than uglier ones.
Three, men value physical attractiveness in their mate more than women do, and so will view a prettier wife as being more valuable.
Sigh, again.
Really? Really?!?
This is one of those things you really wish weren’t true, but you kind of know probably is.
I’ve long thought the cowboy was hotter than I, from a purely physical standpoint. He’s a head-turner. I’m a page-turner. That’s pretty much all there is to it. My forthcoming memoir is filled to bursting with all manner of insecure inner monologues about the fact or our uneven outwardly visible genetics, from our early days of dating. He assures me I’m beautiful, but…c’mon. I mean, I’m not ugly, but I’m not a model, like he was.
I do hope there are exceptions to this icky rule…but, then again, the cowboy and I are nowhere near marriage…so…oh, wait. Maybe that’s why. God, I hope not.
Anyway, what do you think? Does the unfortunate truth contained within this study annoy you as much as it does me? What do you think is going on behind the findings?
Tagged: successful marriages, ugly husbands
I think this is another one of those things like the conservatives have greater sex thing. Phooey! I’m sure you can find as many pros as cons for either one of these. Funny, I had a conversation with my granddaughter about what makes for a successful marriage just this morning. Aside from the crazy falling in love at first sight thing ( which actually happened to us) it takes work and intelligence, understanding and patience, listening and liking each other, and most of all, love. (And according to all reports we were both damn good looking!)
Yes! Phooey!!!!!! I love it. I’d agree with the accounts about you both, according to the photos in your book! xo
Thanks! Them’s sweet words to an 80 year old broad! Have a great weekend!
I loved this……but then I looked at my current failed marriage and remembered hearing on many occasions “you are so better than him” , “he is totally not in your league” , “what the heck are you doing with him”…….well first, I’m not no where near HOT, cute…maybe …….but i didn’t think he was THAT bad and i guess some where in the back of my mind i did know i was somewhat better looking then him and hoped that in he would not stray like some of the men (slightly better looking then him) i’ve dated…….but I was wrong, this man was a complete ass…..thought he all that and more and treated me like crap and cheated.
I once dated a man that my friends nicknamed “ET” ok, so he was bald ……very boney…….and had a nose like gonzo and yes i thought i should date ugly so he wouldn’t mess around but no because he was a “doctor” he thought everyone wanted him…….so his ego was big…….and he’s still single 10 years later.
If only you could see what I see, baby……..you are beautiful. I marvel every time I see you, and it’s never enough.
I’m not quite sure how I got so lucky, but I’ll take it.
I think that if you both think you’re lucky that’s probably a good sign. I feel like that about my cowboy and he about me. It’s a good recipe.
Thats one heck of a good answer. I’d try to say something like that to my girl friend and it would come out backwords.
I totally agree, as long as you both think that you are lucky to have each other than that is success. I personally think that respect and honesty are the key, after the first physical connection!
I like that. I’m not quite sure how I got so lucky, or blessed, either, but it was incredible, all 51+ years. (And it wasn’t long enough.) And from what I can see, you are beautiful, lady, and he ain’t bad either! Hope you have as much as we did.
Well then, I’m in trouble. My Cowboy can definitely be physically attractive when he wants, but mostly he is a consummate charmer. And I DO believe these stats, as well as the “conservatives make better lovers” stats. It seems the only ones who don’t believe those stats are liberals!s
No, Shannon. It’s us who aren’t conservative who had an incredible non-conservative lover for more than half a century!! Note: Just got back from a cattle show and it was so hot the cattle were ready to go home before it started! And when did ‘liberal’ become a dirty word? I think a few people from the past would resent that including our founding fathers and Jesus Christ.
Well if I had an incredible non-conservative lover for half a century, I’d consider myself blessed to beat the stats. And your testimony encourages me! Just because something is statistically true, doesn’t mean it is a foregone conclusion for ME (or you).
Maybe the definition of liberal changed? And I don’t believe that our founding fathers nor Jesus were/are liberals in the current political definition. It would be time consuming to get into a debate about it but I doubt that either of us could change the others’ mind, so I won’t get into why I believe that. PLUS, I’ve got a gun safety course to attend. So, I’m off!
Sorry, Alisa, didn’t mean to make your blog a political whatever. I just get so tired of being called names. I think many of us are liberal about some things and conservative about others. I just hate the epithets and the way they are used. I apologize. Must be the heat.